1:11 a.m. - 2005-09-05
Sweet goodbyes still running through my mind.
I haven't eaten in 4 days. I've stayed home since Thursday morning. I don't think this is the flu......

I just, I can't eat. I can't. Wednesday morning I went out to brunch with the girls from work, took two bites of my food and set the plate aside. Thats when it started.

I've come to the conclusion that it's all in my head. The funny and bizzare thing about it is, I think this has to do with Erik. I knew love would feel different, but I didn't think it would be painful. My mom says it's just my nerves, that when I can relax and get over the newness of all this I won't feel this way anymore.

I'm having dinner with his parents tonight.

So freaked out.

I'm nervous over what I am gonna do to mess it up. I can just picture myself turning nauseated as soon as someone passes a dish, spending the next half hour in the bathroom getting sick.

Either that or his mom is gonna say something really sweet about the two of us and I am gonna start crying.

ENOUGH WITH THE CRYING!!!!

Breathe. Just breathe.

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